Being a true and accurate recording of the mind of one Kiva Ograddam, Dwarven alchemist.
<Note from archivists – while the dwarf seems to have been diligent in her use of the memory crystals this record appears to have several gaps. These have been filled as well as possible, and are indicated as such, however they should be treated as potentially incorrect.>
Goblins. It had to be goblins. Ugh. They won’t let me kill it. Need to get to the prison. Who cares about a carrion king, I need to get Haleen. Tefya tried the key. I think I like her again. Maybe. She shouldn’t have shouted at me earlier though. Ugh they want to go on. Why are they being so stupid. I’m going left. Haleen!!
<further into the battle market> Clearly things are setup for battles. Tefya and Qusai ponder going back for Kiva, but decide to bide their time at first.
The first door is open. HALEEN!! Flying hug. She’s not a prisoner? She’s paid to fight. But…. Ugh. Who cares, she needs to come with us. The others are going to be so happy. Oh maybe not Qusai. I should warn her. Weird, creepy, and strange. Is that the best way to descibe them? Not sure. Can we not play twenty questions. Why don’t they trust her. She’s mine. Qusai can’t have her. See! I told them it was a trap! ugh they weren’t listening, as usual. Why is Qusai trying to hit on her! Stoppit! Mine!
Qusai is really obsessed with breasts. The comment about his mother might have been mean but… at least he’s being honest with her. Unlike Tefya. Maybe I don’t like her after all. Haleen’s going to help us! HalleenHalleenHaaaaaaaaalleen! Mine!
Kardswann is upstairs somewhere with some gnoll and the harpy. That harpy. I still don’t trust that harpy, she’s going to try to kill us. Haleen says we need to kill the rest of the gnolls. I agree. Of course I do. She’s always right. An ogre hurt her, it needs to die. Him and his bugbears.
Tefya’s going to sneak. Haaaaaaaaaaahahahahahaha. At least some of the fighters are armoured she might fit in. Qusai wants to be a gladiator. He’d die, he’s not like Haleen. She made Qusai shut up! She’s so perfect.
We need to be quiet. Hah, that’ll be a first. Ugh bugbears. They should die just because they’re bugbears. Wait, there’s a bar? The keys don’t fit, damn. We’re going to kill things. Haleen in action again. Maybe this time /I/ can save /her/.
Sneaky, sneaky, sneaky, CLANG! Teifyaaaaaa! Ugh, she’s speaking to the ogre. Wow she… actually did it. Maybe she’s not all bad. Then again ogres are stupid.
We’re going on a gnoll hunt.
Going on a gnoll hunt.
Going to kill a greasy one.
A big and ugly greasy one.
They’re all dead.
Qusai! Stop shooting. Ugh, that human. He has no sense.
At least Tillous can hit things quietly. Two of them gone.
Can a table be cursed? Maybe they made it out of pugwampi skin!
Torag, that hurts! Haleeeeeee….
<In the room> Qusai, in a sudden inexplicable fit of niceness, manages to stabilise Kiva and administer a healing potion. Haleen goes berserk and manages to jump on the table and smashes the gnoll. Tefya takes a massive hit from a gnoll but stays standing. The gnoll barks at Haleen and attacks. Qusai shoots again, but it’s Haleen that kills it. The last one falls to Tefya’s blade.
Oh Torag that was awful. Where did I put my potions. Ew, that must’ve been one of Zastoran’s it tasted awful. He needs to learn to put in some mint or some fruit or something. It helps.
Wow the Lions had some nice things. Ours now!
Can’t rest, have to kill things. So sleepy. Wand things, magic things, I don’t care. Can’t we leave? Can’t leave, gnolls will kill us. Ugh. Tillous found some foreign coins. Devil coins.
Magic stuff. Okay it’s not all bad. Upstairs now. Ugh, still hurt from that spear. Stupid gnolls. Wish we’d found something that made madam clankypants quiet, she’s going to let everyone know we’re here! Was that a door? Oh <content removed by archivists> where’s Tillous gone. Oh he was killing things, that’s okay then. Ugh, another table. Not going to jump on this one. Well maybe. If I’m careful. Then I can kick one! Oooh maybe I should go on the table.
Haleen’s gone rushing in. No! Need to help her, she can’t run off like that! Dead gnolls everywhere. Why can’t we do that all the time? Are those pugwampi ears? On a necklace? Ewwwww.
Tillous is going up the stairs, he knows how to not clank. Might not come back though. Oh. He came back. Okay then.
Bomb time!! Ewwww, gnolls stink when you burn them. Haleen got one! The dream team back together at last! Tefya and Tillous found something, guess it must be important if she wrapped it in a blanket but someone should tell her it stinks. Maybe she can borrow some of Qusai’s cologne.
It’s kinda pretty up here.
Tefya seems to think we’ve forgotten we’re here to kill things. Paladins. They’re weird. She’s counting things. Well whatever keeps her happy.
Where did I put that potion of enlarge person? Should I tell her first? Meh. She’ll figure it out.
Chaaaaaaaarge! But not too quickly.
Tillous dropped his sword. Humans!
“Kardswann, you are a disgrace to the order of the five winds and I, Vardishal, am here to stop you.”
What? Vardishal? Tefiya’s gone mad! And she never drank the potion. Paladins! You can’t trust ’em.
Where’d Haleen go? Dammit. I need that potion back. Bomb to the FACE! He cannot hurt her! MINE!
Tefya’s going off again about him knowing her and that he needs to repent. She’s lost it. Drink the damn potion and hit him already! Stop talking at him.
Beware Haleen for she is small and mighty!
The gnoll! Oops, forgot the gnoll. Bomb to the face. Ewwww, he stinks worse than the others.
Tefya’s still talking. Just hit him!!
Qusai! He’s annoying but he’s mine! No shoving him off the balcony!
Tefya’s talking agaaaaain. Ugh. Wait… he’s shaking? He’s scared of her? We need to kill who? Under the what? Oh, he wants us to kill /him/, we can do that.
Tillous killed the gnoll. Well, good for him, I killed 4 with one bomb.
Tefya killed Kardswann. Too much talking. Djinn are weird.